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Tonja's Gatherings - A Christian Blogger from Dothan, AL
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Family, General

LEARNING HOW TO SMILE

July 19, 2011 by tonja 7 Comments

SMILE:

A facial expression characterized by an upward curving of the corners of the mouth and indicating pleasure, amusement, or derision.

A pleasant or favorable disposition or aspect.To have or form a smile.

 

A SMILE WILL MAKE YOU HAPPIER

Know that wonderful feeling you get when you have a great workout? That’s from the happy chemicals the body produces called ENDORPHINS. Athletes experience this after their workout or competition. They call it a natural high. Smiling releases endorphins. Endorphins not only create a happier state mentally when they are released into the body, but they also have a variety of other health benefits.  Smiling and laughter have been proven to release endorphins in the body in the same way that they are released for an athlete.  So, by increasing laughter and smiling in your life can release endorphins in your body, ultimately providing you a variety of health benefits above. Smiling allows each and every one of us to provide our body with healing benefits. In fact, it can be your own prescription to heal and prevent ailments. So, SMILE !  Right now !  Coooome on…..THERE!  Now don’t you feel better?

“A cheerful heart is a good medicine,

but a crushed spirit dries up the bones.”    Proverbs 17:22   NIV

 

 

The most wonderful smile of all, however…..is your grandson’s FIRST smile…at YOU !

 

 

 

Life is like a mirror, we get the best results when we smile at it!

 

 

 

 


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Friends, General, HUMOR

DID THIS…AND THIS…AND THIS…

July 16, 2011 by tonja 5 Comments

Today, I  felt well enough to get out for a while.  I  had lunch with two dear friends.  We caught up on all that has happened in the last several months.  There was not a minute of silence until we split up to go home.

Don’t you love having friends like that?  Those that you can see 5 or 6 times a year…and it is like you’ve never been apart.  We would love to get together more, but, one has her first grandchild on the way…in another city.  And the other has 2 sweet grand boys who live out of town. And I am involved with Levi and Alex.  Plus the other things we are all involved in, leaves little time for such frivolity as whiling away 3 hours over lunch!  But, even though we don’t get together as often as we’d like…one call would bring any of us running at a moments notice.  I hope you have friends like this.

Since I was out, I tried to run an errand or two.  Went to one store to pick up a gift. I started to the door and was getting in the check out line.  But I must have been tired or something because I forget…... I MUST peruse the homegoods  just  in case there is something new on the shelves that they are saving for me!  But, today, after I made a quick glance… only a set of nice sheets that I had been looking for was of interest to me.  I must tell you that I LOVE  *RL* sheets.    In case that does not make sense to you the first name is ‘Ralph”.  Alex loves these too.  When we moved into the Creekhouse, Mom bought Alex two sets, and had them monogramed on the pillowcases.  That is the only sheet he wants, and the only sheet he sleeps on.  The ones he’s using now still look very nice, and are not even beginning to look like they are wearing out.  They are more expensive $$$, but they feel sooooo good.  They are usually sold in better department stores.  However, if you are a wise and observant shopper…like ‘huh um’…ME…you can find them at stores such as TJM*XX.

Passed by the kids section, and thought that it wouldn’t hurt to look for something cute for the  GREATEST GRANDSON IN THE WORLD !!!  So I look for the baby boy clothes.  There they are.  No, they are over here. No. WAIT ! They are back there.  This drives me crazy.  They have clothes here, there and everywhere, and they are all mixed up.  Sale things, clearance things, and regular price.  No rhyme or reason to their method.  And, the sizes are sorta mixed up, too.  Though, that is really not their fault.  Lots of people just hang things wherever they want.  Also at fault, that Mama and Grandmama who are letting their kids crawl UNDER the clothes racks and come up in the middle and swing on the racks while they (the adults) are laughing and talking and gossiping (I heard them) and generally paying them no mind and all the while clothes of every size are falling on the floor beside the racks and under the racks and piling up on the floor…and in their loudest OUTSIDE voice, they are singing, in a sing song fashion, which gives music a bad name, “You ca-n’t see me.  You ca-n’t see me.  I ca-an do this and you ca-n’t stop me.”  They sang it once, twice, two hundred times!  I couldn’t help myself.  I was already in a mood, because I was, and this was NOT helping.  So, I went around on the other size and pretended I was picking something up off the floor and stuck my head under that rack and looked those hoodlums straight in the eyes.  They were scared, they did not know what was coming next.  Most grown-up people don’t play with them under the racks.   And, I said, quietly so the adults would not come over and take me down, “This is not acceptable.  Only wild and crazy children act like this.  I will not stand for it, I tell you.  Now do the right thing.”  The girl  had quivering lips, and the boy had tears forming in the corner of his eyes.  I don’t care. I’m happy to play the Mommy if the real Mommy has forgotten how!  They came out of their hideout under the clothes.  Their lips were sealed.  They couldn’t speak.  They went to the imposters who were pretending to be their Mama and Grandmama and hung on for dear life.  They never said a word.  And I travelled around the 3 long racks looking for something for Sweet Levi who is really growing. ( Have you seen this guy lately?  He’s a chunk!!!)………I shopped in peace. They never made a sound. Each time I pushed past them, they got further and further behind the adults.  I finally found some little onesies in Levi’s size  and prepared to leave the war zone.  I made one more pass by them and gave them both a big smile, and went on my way.

It’s not nice to mess with a tired, sick Grandmother when she’s ‘in a mood.’

What?  You’ve not ever been in that situation?  I know you have.  So, I had to address it.  You think I was mean?  It was either make them stop or go in there and join them,  Cause I was in a mood, after all…you understand.

And so, I really headed to the check-out.  And, then I heard it…there was so much rain falling on the roof and in the parking lot… even some hail…I could not even see my car!    Now, my friends, you know I don’t do lightning…and it was!  And, they don’t have a nice set of chairs to sit and wait in.  So, I kept walking, and looking.  Found some wonderful things that asked…practically BEGGED!…to come home with me, but I just was not in the mood.    It is bad to be stuck in a store, and not feel like shopping.  And I really needed to sit down.  There were some benches between the outside door and the inside door, but they were both made of glass.  Which meant I would be very close to the lightning and I would have to look at it because the bench faced out.  This would not have been good for my ‘mood’.  Not good at all.  So, I headed for the shoes. They have two little benches at the end of two of the aisles.  It was empty and no one looked as if they needed it, so, I took a seat.  Whew!   “Lord, please let it stop for 5 minutes, so I can get to my car.”

There was an elderly woman…much more ‘eldier’ than me…sitting on the other bench, trying on shoes.  A shiver ran down my spine.  I prayed to be invisible.   I knew when I saw her she did not like to shop alone.  She needed someone to bounce ideas off of.   And, I was right.

EL:  Hon, whatdaya think about these shoes?

They were green and glittery with a big, blue, glittery bow on the top.

ME:  Well, they are really pretty if you have the right dress to wear them with.  Are you going to a party?

EL:  No, but I’s go to church ever Sunday…and I’s jest thinkin these ‘uns would look good with my new white suit.

ME:  Well, I just bet they would.  (I was not in the mood to give her the benefit of my fashion sense,  or I would have told her they were hideous and should only be worn in one of those ‘Womanless Beauty Pageants where the men dress up like women.  Every thing is a joke…just like those shoes.)

EL:  I jest don’t knows what to do.  I’ma thinkin’ I could wear ’em with a lot of things.  See, I has a blue suit, and a black suit, and my new white suit.  I’m thinking I could wear them with all those suits.  Don’t you think so?

ME:  I’m sure they would make an undeniable statement if you did.

EL:  What’s that mean?

ME:  Just that everyone will notice your shoes when you wear them.

EL:  Well, these is the kinda shoes to notice.

ME:  Oh, yes ma’am!

EL:  I bet you might like these better.

And y’all, she picks up a pair of red shoes….bright red patent leather shoes.  A strip of zebra striped fabric went over the toe and around the whole shoe.  The stiletto heels were black…patent leather, of course.

ME:  Hmmm. Those really are interesting.  Don’t think I have ever seen any like this before.  What are you planning to wear these with?

EL:  Well, you knows I got them suits I told you about.  I could wear these with the white suit or the black suit.  But, I don’t think they would look good with the blue, do you?

ME:  No, I think you are right.    You like unusual shoes, don’t you?

EL:  I suppose I do.

ME.:  I can understand that…so do I.

EL:  (She looked over at me, and looked down at my shoes…black T*ms.)

Well, I’m just telling you, Girl, them shoes you got on sho’ don’t do nothin’ for you.

ME:  These are comfortable, and I like them.  But, the truth is, they don’t make shoes like you have picked out in my size.  Those are usually just for people with really BIG feet.

And, with that, I stood up to look outside and it had stopped raining, so I said: “ Gotta go, it’s stopped raining.  You have a great day.  And, I think you should get both pair of the shoes!”

She was still staring at me, and said nary a word.  Good.  O.K. Then.

I was able to check out quickly and get to the car.  Then I ran ( well, walked ) into the grocery store to pick up only the ‘must haves’.  And, headed home.

Oh the experiences one can have when you least expect it!

PS……….If you like green glitter shoes with a big blue bow on top, I think that’s great.  YOU are wise enough to know you have to have the right dress to wear them with……………………………….and it is NOT a black suit that you wear on Sunday…but you know that!

PPS……….If you like red patent leather shoes with zebra trim and a black stiletto heel…well, good for you!  You are obviously a fun person, and wise.  Wise enough not to wear them to church on Sunday.

PPPS……….If you are a Mama or a Grandmama and you let your children act like wild Indians and throw clothes on the floor and damage the ear drums of other shoppers,   I will not go shopping with you if they come along.

***************************************************

I was such a pompous girl when I was pregnant for the first time…”My children will never throw food in a restaurant.  My child will never throw himself down in the floor and have a tantrum.  My child will never climb under the clothes racks and scream and swing.”  How quickly I learned that “Yes, Ma’am, they will. ”  But…only once.   Unless they totally lose their mind and forget the lesson they learned as soon as we left wherever we were when they provided such wonderful entertainment.

Of course, Sweet Levi would never do things such as this when I take him out in the future.  But, should he try.  I’ll let his daddy or his uncles explain to him why he better not ever do it again !

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Reading time: 9 min
Faith, Family, General, Remembering

WE REMEMBER

July 14, 2011 by tonja 6 Comments
 WE REMEMBER

At the rising of the sun and at its going down, 
At the blowing of the wind and in the chill of winter. 
At the opening of the buds and in the rebirth of spring,
At the shining of the sun and in the warmth of summer. 
At the rustling of the leaves and in the beauty of autumn,
At the beginning of the year and at its end. 
As long as we live, she too will live....
.....for she is now a part of us, as we remember her.
 
When we are weary and in need of strength, 
When we are lost and sick at heart.
When we have joy we crave to share, 
When we have decisions that are difficult to make. 
When we have achievements that are based on hers,
When we fulfill her dreams, and our own. 
As long as we live, she too will live...
.....for she is now a part of us, as we remember her.

copied

..........graduation picture..........

 


..........in front of the house I grew up in....pregnant with me...
loved the maternity fashion back then.........




..........Mom and Pop took a trip around the world...and this is 
somewhere with ruins. Greece or Rome, I don't really know.But, I love
these 2 pictures because she is striding forth with such confidence. 
I know these pics are not easy to see...but in the first one she does
not know she is being photographed...and in the second...she see's him.
and out pops the smile!. I love how stylish she looks here...flared
pants, big sunglasses..........




..........I had to include this one because it looks as if I am looking
 back to see what she is doing. Because, she loved this old, ugly bush
 behind her...planted so conveniently right by the back door. I tried
 to tear it down numerous times...but never any luck. This, you see,
 was the switch bush...and Joy and I were both very familiar with it.
 And, believe me when I tell you, she truly believed that verse in
 the Bible that says something like..."spare the 'switch' and spoil the
 child". There was no chance of me getting spoiled. Ever. 
 No chance at all..........




 ..........Doing what she loved to do ...feeding her family..........
 


***And no matter what anybody says about grief and about time healing
 all wounds...the truth is, there are certain sorrows that never fade
 away until the heart stops beating and the last breath is taken.***

Mom moved to heaven 2 years ago today, and we remember.

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Family, General

HAPPY HAPPY BIRTHDAY, POP !

July 9, 2011 by tonja 7 Comments

Today is my Pop’s birthday…he is 85!  Isn’t that wonderful?  We are so blessed to have him with us.

I love this pic of him and my Mom.  Don’t know where they were going…but they were dressed to perfection!

Motorcycles have been a big part of his life…all of his life.

Joy and I were blessed with a happy childhood, and wonderful parents.

These days he’s doing as much of this as he can!

And, he loves doing this…

But, he is especially happy on the days he can do this…

and this…

So, have a good one, Pop…

You are loved…

 

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Faith, Family, Friends, General, Remembering

THE TIES THAT BIND

July 8, 2011 by tonja 6 Comments

Friends, I have been writing on this post since Sunday.  I have written and re-written, and removed paragraphs, and put in new ones.  Why?  I usually just sit  down to write and the things I want to say come easily.  In this instance,  I have agonized over the words.  I want to explain the way I feel, but I keep second guessing myself…wondering if I am explaining too much, or if I’m not being clear at all.  This post has come from deep inside and it’s important to me that it be exactly as I hear it in my heart.  So, please be forgiving if something strikes you the wrong way.  Know that it is only my intention to say how I feel.  I speak for myself, and even though Joy and I discussed this, I do not claim to speak for her- even though she probably would totally agree.  Cause, I AM her big sister, after all!

This week there has been some sad news in our town, and in our church.  Some dear friends who we have known since childhood, found that their son had passed away during the night.  I can not imagine what you do when you go through something so devastating. I can not imagine  their pain.

There was a time, many years ago, a group of us young married women..still girl’s really… who were members at SBC,  were having babies just as quick as we could.  First one, then another, then another.  This went on for quite a few years…until we all came to our senses!  We produced a wonderful group of boys who were friends from their first Sunday in the nursery.

 

 

 

I can’t even remember who came first, and I sure hope I do not leave any out, but there was my Alex, Clarke, Jud, Harrison, Adam , Josh, Tyler,  my Ian,  Justin, Reid,  Chase, Russ, and these were just the boys that I can recall.

 

 

 

 

They went to several different schools and had other friends, but they all came together again on Sunday’s and the bonds were still there.  They were in Sunday School, choir, Discipleship, Camp Thunder, R.A.’s,  and summer programs together.    They all had parts in our Living Christmas Tree for many years.   Then, they went their own ways…as all young men should do.    And now, they are scattered all around.  Some are married and have started their families..raising little boys and girls themselves. Some are still working on their careers.  Some  live and work in other cities.    Some have gone to school and have come home to Dothan  Some have come home to SBC and worship in the church they grew up in.  Others are in Dothan and worship elsewhere.  And, two are in Heaven.  Adam went to Heaven when he was about 16…injured in a car accident.  And, now Harrison  has joined him there.

It is  hard, sometimes, to remember the things you know are true when something comes along to shake your life and change your world.    And usually, it comes from out of the blue.  I think it can be such a shock to us, that we tend to forget the things we know.  At these moments, there is only us and the pain and the unrealness of the situation.  After all, we are only human.  We know that God will uphold us.  We know that He will comfort us.  We know that he will walk with us.   We know His promises are true.  We may feel forsaken…even though we know He will never forsake us. (Deuteronomy 31:6)  We wonder how we will live and go on and plan a funeral and get up the next day, and the next, and the next. How will we care for the ill family member, day after day and week after week and month after month and year after year?  We may feel lost and alone…but He has promised to be our strength. (Jeremiah 29:11)  And, He keeps all His promises.  We may think that we will never feel happiness or excitement or joy ever again…but it is He who will comfort us. ( Isaiah 51:12)  And the time will come, amidst the crying and unbelief and sadness, and pleading, when we realize that we are doing what needs to be done.  We are taking care of the things we need to.  We are still sad and may need to cry…that’s just what we do… that will last for a while.  And for each of us, it is different.  But, we are getting a boost from somewhere.  We are amazed at ourselves.  We didn’t think we could cope…but we are.  And, then…we remember…we remember what He promised us, “I will NEVER leave you.  I will be with you WHEREVER you go.”   Deuteronomy 31:6       Even to bury your child.  Even to bury your Mother or Father.  Even to bury a spouse.  Even to deal with a  child’s devastating illness…which, in reality, takes his life, too.  It may an illness for you or a spouse or a parent. You may even have to care for someone who doesn’t even remember who you are.  Maybe you lose all your worldly possessions due to flood or fire or whatever .  Whatever comes to disturb our safe and secure world, He walks beside us there.   We  do what we have to do.    And, we thank Him for holding us up and giving us strength.  We forget again, and sink into despair…but, He’s right there…walking us through it…holding our hand…drying our tears.

 

There are other ways He sends comfort to us.  We may read something….a poem, a quote, or an article that has all the words we need to hear.  Soon after her death, I was looking through some of the journals that Mom kept.    I came across a poem that she had cut out of a book or a magazine and taped into a journal.  Beautiful and touching words about losing someone we hold dear.   Exactly what I needed to hear.   We may hear someone say something that resonates with us.  Perhaps we hear something on the radio or TV.  We will ‘accidentally’ come across scripture that God must have put in the Bible just for us.  And, He did.  Because He knew we were going to need it.  He knew the exact day and time we were going to need it.  So, He made sure we would see it.  And, we did.   If God wants to send us a message, He will.   And we WILL get it.

 

Corrie Ten Boom once said:

“Every experience God gives us, every person He puts in our lives, is the perfect preparation for the future that only He can see.”

And, it is true.  You may not have experienced it yet, but you will.    Many have experienced sadness and grief and shock in their lives.  And, to those who know Jesus as their Savior, He has given sweet comfort and peace.  I have felt it.  I can testify that it is true.  I know what peace and comfort only He can provide.  You have probably felt it, too.   And, if you are like me…you feel compelled to reach out to others who are hurting and tell them what you have discovered through your experience.    For along with His comfort and sweet peace, He has given us a task.  .  He says in 2 Corinthians 1:3-4 “ All praise to God, the Father of our Lord Jesus Christ. God is our merciful Father and the source of all comfort.  He comforts us in all our troubles so that we can comfort others. When they are troubled, we will be able to give them the same comfort God has given us.”   We  are commanded to do this…but we would anyway.  Because, when you know what He can do, and what He has done for you….you want those you care about that are hurting to know about it, too.  And so you go and remind them of what they already know…but they need to be reminded…just as you did.  Friend helping friend…helping friend.


BLEST BE THE TIE THAT BINDS

Blest be the tie that binds
Our hearts in Christian love;
The fellowship of kindred minds
Is like to that above.

Before our Father’s throne
We pour our ardent prayers;
Our fears, our hopes, our aims are one
Our comforts and our cares.

We share each other’s woes,
Our mutual burdens bear;
And often for each other flows
The sympathizing tear.

When we asunder part,
It gives us inward pain;
But we shall still be joined in heart,
And hope to meet again.

This glorious hope revives
Our courage by the way;
While each in expectation lives,
And longs to see the day.

From sorrow, toil and pain,
And sin, we shall be free,
And perfect love and friendship reign
Through all eternity.


lyrics…John Fawcett

I was not able to be in church last Sunday, but Joy said the sadness and shock  of this young man’s death could be felt everywhere.  And, then she said something else, which has resonated with me.  A core group of us, who call SBC our church home, our church family, have been in this church since we were young ourselves.  Joy and I started there while we were in grade school.  So, the adults who were our teachers, had children who were our friends.  We developed friendships, strong friendships, and grew  up, and had children of our own.  We, then were the teachers, and our teachers became the grandparents…and some…great-grandparents.  And, now we, though many of us still teach, we are also becoming the grandparents.   And our children are becoming the teachers. And so it goes.  Now, isn’t that a beautiful thing?  Just the way that God intended a family to operate.  Titus 2:3-5 says that “the older women are to teach the younger women.”   Our hearts are invested in these families.  We care, because when something bad happens…it effects the people who loved and nurtured us, and the people we loved and nurtured.  And, the ones who are to come.  It is our friends, and our parent’s friends, and our children’s friends.  And it is all because we are a family…a church family…the family of God.

The funeral is coming, and we will gather to mourn and love and pray together.  Friends who live elsewhere will arrive, and there will be hugs and slaps on the back because we have missed them and are glad to see them.  And, then, we will remember together.  And, we will cry together.  And, yes, we will worship and praise our God together.  Because in the midst of this horrible sadness, we are not defeated.  Because we know:

“Can anything ever separate us from Christ’s love? Does it mean he no longer loves us if we have trouble or calamity, or are persecuted, or hungry, or destitute, or in danger, or threatened with death? ……… No, despite all these things, overwhelming victory is ours through Christ, who loved us.

And I am convinced that nothing can ever separate us from God’s love. Neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons, neither our fears for today nor our worries about tomorrow — not even the powers of hell can separate us from God’s love. No power in the sky above or in the earth below — indeed, nothing in all creation will ever be able to separate us from the love of God that is revealed in Christ Jesus our Lord” Romans 8:35 – 39

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I am a Christian woman who has survived many years on the planet. God has blessed me with a wonderful family: husband, 3 sons, a dear DIL, and a precious grandson. I also have dear friends to keep me inspired. I am an artist of sorts and am finding my way through the great blessing of retirement. I recently retired after 20 years as a music teacher. Life is good!

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