I am not a cook. I do not like to cook…never have. And, I do not see that changing any time in the near future..

Today, I was browsing through the January issue of G**d H*usekeeping. On the front cover there were the words: EASY Winter Recipes…14 one dish dinners your family will love. Now that sounded that something I could get my mind around. I love to make soups and stews and things in the crock pot. (But, I don’t really call that cooking.) Here is just a sampling of what I read.

1. Beef Carbonnade..”.dark beer gives this a deep, rich taste.” What exactly is dark beer? Is it different from light beer?

2. Black Bean Tortilla Soup..”.chicken thighs, lime juice and poblanos boost the broth of this crowd pleaser.” I do not even know what section of the store to go to to look for ‘poblanos’.

3. Veal Shoulder Chops Osso Buco Style…who can explain ‘Osso Buco’ style?

4. Chinese Red-Cooked Pork Shoulder…as opposed to…say green-cooked or blue-cooked?

5. Indian Cauliflower Curry Stew…the list of ingredients calls for garbanzo beans, cilantro, curry, and yogurt. Yogurt? With Cauliflower? Now you know that does not even sound good.

6. Lamb and Root Vegetable Tagine…‘Tagine?’…what would that be?

7. Peruvian Fish Soup…I know fish, and I know soup, and I know where Peru is. But, look at these ingredients: jalapeno chilies, clam juice, limes, cod fillets ,scallops, cilantro AND 1/2 pound cleaned squid, bodies sliced crosswise into 1/4 in. wide rings and tentacles cut into pieces. I don’t know about you, but I don’t think I could even buy squid in my town. And, if I could, I wouldn’t. And, if I did…I would not clean it and slice it crosswise into1/4 in. rings or go messing with his tentacles!

8. Ropa Vieja…the explanation of this recipe is…” the name of this Latin-style braised beef literally means ‘old clothes’ because the meat can be shredded into what resembles a pile of rags.” YUM-MY! I know that sounds appetizing!

The only recipe that looked remotely like anything I would or could try was an advertisement for Campbell’s soup. Their recipe for Hearty Chicken and Noodle Casserole was written in plain English and contained only the ingredients the majority of American women would have in their pantry.